While on vacation in Kauai, my wife and I went on an ATV tour. I was always trying to break it open, but their terms of service said no passing, so it was hard to get going. On the very last corner I did get to rooster it, which was satisfying, if brief ;)

There are man made water reservoirs on Kauai, and we passed one of them in the middle of the trip, where we stopped for juice and cookies. The tour guides pulled out fishing poles and allowed some of the small kids that were in dune buggies to go fishing. They didn't have a fly fishing kit, just a string tied to a stick, and they put a cookie on the hook at bait! Within 1 minute of putting the cookie in the water the kid caught a fish.

I never thought fish ate cookies, but maybe they are smarter than we give them credit for being ;)

Before leaving from our honeymoon my wife and I stopped in a small jewelry shop in Kauai. The person behind the counter mentioned that a rapper came in about 6 months earlier. The rapper was angry that nobody knew who he was in spite of wearing a big obnoxious piece of jewelry. And while the MTV and grind your booty Maxim marketing chanels would like you to believe that particular rapper had style over substance he clearly lacked both. He bought $4,000 of jewelry then a few days later returned it all. Absolutely without class!

My wife and I are having our first anniversary coming up soon. I wonder if getting a yoda bowling ball would be ok as long as I get her a hello kitty one?

From a third floor balcony I saw two wolf-like dogs go up to another dog and start barking at it point blank. I then spit downward near them and scared the crap out of them to where they left the other dog alone.

They parted ways and started walking away. Then after about a minute they started moving nearer the dog they were growling at so I growled and scared the shit out of them and they left the poor little dog alone.

How often do we see such things but ignore them because the dogs are not ours and they are of no concern to us?

Fat, Dumb & Happy...and, um, sloth.

Right before bed I brushed my teeth. I took step back and wound up in dog piss. Earlier today, in another episode of pee on Aaron's feet, the dog peed on the floor and I walked through it. I asked my girlfriend if it was water or piss. She said "it is pee. this is perfect." She then asked me what I was doing when I went to change my socks.

I think I mostly enjoy when I do good with golf because it makes my lover happy. Today she told me that I should get good at short puts before trying long ones. So I putted from ~ 30 feet, and it hit the pole... it would have went in if the pole was not there :)

I went riding bicycles with the girlfriend today. We had lots of fun, but I was powerslide braking the bike and blew up a tire. So to recap our sports adventures:

• biking - blew up a tire
  
• kayaking - fell in the water within 5 minutes
  
• golf - drive almost as far as pros can, but then sometimes miss really really really bad
  
• tennis - serve like a professional, but threw my back out

When you kiss your cell phone and wave at your laptop does that make you crazy, or just mean you love technology?

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It looks as though some bots are well in tune with the content of my website. Via instant message:

[01:59] jean_fracois_jman2@hotmail.com: Screw $(RANDCHARS) ME! http://tinyurl.com/y6ozkr

One step at a time, please. Ask me if I am horney prior to making the sales pitch. It is not the other night anymore. Your relationships are going to be a bit rocky if you come in with that approach.