July 24, 2005

Loaning a Friend My Car so they can run me over with it

Sure the title of this post sounds stupid, but something very similarly happened to me recently. I tried helping a friend do well on the web, they ignored most of the tips I offered, and then eventually they started making a bit of money and when that number went down they did the nuclear option, and created hate posts about me and tried to destroy my business model.

This is a person who I went so far as to pay their rent for them so they were not homeless (while still heavily in debt myself at the time).

Even though they were a friend wasting my time helping them so they could stab me in the back (and front, really) is a perfect example of why it is worth taking the time to only chose good clients and to only help people with good karma.

I can't change another person and it is unlikely that I will knowingly let many other people change me unless I want to change. If a client or friend is stuck in the past then it is probably not worth helping them out unless you have enough slack in your schedule and business model to absorb any pain that causes.

Never underestimate how bad they will try to make that pain feel. I was unproductive at work for the last week because of shit like that, but I also took some time to get into things I left behind...like video games :)

Posted at July 24, 2005 11:39 PM

Your response to the situation shows that you are a true mensch. You had the opportunity to strike back at him on your blog, but did not (by not naming names). Don't let the actions of bad people disrupt your state of mind. It's an unavoidable part of life that people will fuck you over for their own selfish gain. Not retaliating shows true character and makes you stronger.

A couple years back, I was in a similar situation. Someone spammed and slandered my name all over blogs and forums, harming my reputation. A google search for my name yielded nasty results. It made it very difficult to finding a tech job, because hiring managers "googled" me and immediately turned away. After an exhaustive effort of emailing forum administrators, bloggers, and even sending snail mail overseas, I've managed to remove 99% of the malicious libel.

After this painful period of my life, I managed to rebound. I realized how important search engines were becoming in influencing people's decisions. The moral of the story is that this bad episode turned out to be a turning point in my life. It sparked my interest in search engines, and I learned a bit of SEO/SEM. What was used as a weapon against me is now becoming a source of profit. I am now focused on learning more each day about search engine optimization. The search engine was my enemy, and now it is my means of substinance.

Hi Avi
actually off the start I ranted back, but then later deleted it ...

I am sorry bro.

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